TEXT We publish stuff that we love reading. We love reading stuff that is funny and/or sad (but true!), in which things happen in less than 2,000 words. We don’t care about form, style, rhythm, concepts, theme, structure, grammar, spelling, punctuation, genre, archetypes, content, who-you-are, what-sort-of-car-you-drive, or who-you-finger-bang. That being said, we do believe in magic, which is to say: none of that stuff matters, just the words and what order they arrive in. But what's truly mind blowing is: We can't publish your stuff if you don't send it! COMICS Send your comics, please. Really, just like, go nuts. AUDIO You're welcome to send us a mixtape, but we're sort of snobs when it comes to music. So if you can hear it on the radio, we probably don't care. And if you can't, we probably don't care. It's just like, very unlikely. EBOOKS Longish short stories would be best for an ebook. Let’s say 15,000 words or less, but probably more like 10,000. You may want to suggest art if you have some ideas. We hope to publish an ebook every three to six months or so, as long as we get something we love – it’s all about the love. when & where Submissions are rolling, constantly rolling, which makes it easy for you to submit to us (our office is below a group of hills). But it’s probably best if you just attach your thing to an email (no docx please), write a little note (if you feel like it) and send it to submissions@hahaclever.com. AESTHETICS If you’re still confused about what we’re looking for, try this: paint your face blue, drink a bottle of absinthe, and go for a bicycle ride – don’t come back until the town pariah hands you a golden chalice full of movie-blood – you’ll know what to do.